No excessive or undue conversation in the restroom.
a. Keep eyes forward whenever possible
b. Always close the stall door, even when going #1
If you bring beer to a party, you must drink your beer first before drinking anyone else's....unless otherwise permitted by the host.
a. If you bring beer to a party and need to leave, the beer stays there.
No man shall give himself a nickname.
This is an ongoing list of words no man should use, ever.
Garment
Periwinkle
Magical
Supple
Duvet
Precious
Fabulous
Adore
Lavender
Mommy or Daddy
Never watch the movie "The Notebook"
If you have an option, never use the urinal right next to a man who is already underway.
No phone conversations in a public restroom.
Never talk to another man while your junk is hanging out.
Never dress to match your girlfriend or wife.
Two men should never walk down the street under the same umbrella.
Never drop a #2 in a club except in an emergency.
No man should ever take longer then 10 seconds looking in the mirror in a public bathroom.
Never let a woman order for you in a restaurant.
Never drive drunk or let a friend drive drunk.
No man should ever ride bitch on an other man's motorcycle.
Under no circumstances is any man allowed to send an emoticon ;-) =) emo-fun.gif etc. to another man.
A man should never ask for details from another man regarding personal matters like divorce or sex. If he wants you to know he will tell you.
You can't narc out a buddy for showing up to work hungover. You can however harass him as much as possible.
A man must never wear a Speedo in public. The exceptions are water polo players, secret agents, and dudes who are tough enough to kick everyone's ass.
If you need to change in a public bathroom use the stall
No man shall ever feed or be fed by another man, unless the recipient of said feeding is physically or mentally handicapped, or otherwise restricted in any way that prevents feeding oneself.
There is no reason for a man to watch men's figure skating or men's gymnastics. EVER.
Unless you're in prison, never fight naked
No man should ever speak badly about bacon or sex.
No man shall ever work another man's BBQ unless specifically asked to.
No man shall have any kind of fuzzy decoration on, or in, his car.
Guidelines for the Man hug.
A. No back rubbing.
B. No resting of the chin on his shoulder.
C. No sighing, crying, closing of the eyes, or speaking.
D. Shall not last longer then 2 seconds.
"If" your girlfriend or wife finds your porn, cop to it. In fact be proud. Real men are not ashamed of watching porn. If your mom finds it, blame someone else.
No man shall ever be required to buy another man a birthday gift. In fact, even remembering you're buddies birthday is strictly optional.
No man should ever wear a thong, and under absolutely no circumstances should he ever admit to it.
Topic: Here are your man rules. Follow them or die. (Read 9139 times)